Posts tagged ‘pagan issues’

October 3, 2014

In the realm of: Oh, what now?

So, yesterday morning’s Social Justice Warrior crap hit me in a prodromal migraine period, which means that I stewed on it all day as I threw together that epic rant. I posted it after the migraine had subsided enough for me to proofread enough for some degree of coherency, figured it was okay and toddled off to bed. What could go wrong?

I need to stop thinking that. The universe and creation seem to take it is as a challenge to my psyche. I’m postdromal today which makes me a little more emotional than I care for, but, my husband thinks this circumstance is completely warranted. Allow me to share.

I went to the end of the driveway to get my mail today after work -since I am blessed to work from home, started digging through the unusually large stack of mail and spotted a familiar mint-green envelope that I really should not be receiving anymore. Actually, I should have stopped receiving this damn envelope after a certain meeting happened near the end of 2012 when I had enough and formally stepped down from the role of President of the organization I had founded, financed (almost entirely on my own), put a good 75% of the work into on my own and ran.

I was burned out, I was bitter and cynical. Everyone in the pagan community had an opinion. Everyone wanted something that I couldn’t offer them for an endless number of reasons: I didn’t have the money to put it together, the resources, the training, the knowledge… But, that meant I wasn’t suiting their immediate needs. No one wanted to step up and help. I was their paragon of pagandom. By stepping up at 22 years old (at the time this venture was put together) and filling a void in the community, I had somehow become a magical wish-dispensing machine for the pagans in the entire portion of my state upon which to make demands.

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September 8, 2014

It Will Be

So, my last real update here was on February 26, 2014. I am not proud to admit that I stepped almost entirely away from my religious and spiritual life since not long after that until about a week ago. Sure, there were moments where I would look longingly over at my household altars, clean them up a bit, and think of doing… something (even just a hymn of honor and an offering) but couldn’t bring myself to do much beyond an apologetic sigh of, “I haven’t forgotten you, I’m just… can’t.”

I hate the word can’t. It feels like a cop out. I know that isn’t entirely true, there are points in our lives where we are actually incapable of doing certain things. I hit a brick wall and the only way I was going to get passed it was if I was ready to do so. That’s what it was. I was not falling to my knees and begging, pleading and praying for the gods to come down and alleviate my pain. None of it; not my psychological, emotional, financial or physical pains. I just was going to suck it up and tough it out.

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May 29, 2013

Nothing New I’m Sure

If you’ve been following this blog since the beginning, or maybe know me in person, or via other outlets… you may have noticed a trend:

I am becoming quite jaded and bitter about the greater pagan community. Wiccans, fluffies, recons, eclectics, pseudo-atheists… and all those I didn’t name… I’m coming to hate you with a vitriol that sometimes frightens even myself. So much irritates the crap out of me.

I’ve been struggling to come up with a nice coherent post here about how things are going, how I’m finally replacing my broken Ares statues, how proud I am of the “hearth” I have set up in my kitchen and how wonderfully homey it makes this new place feel with an idol of Hestia looking on as I knead my bread dough… but I’m struggling because I keep getting knocked off balance by some stupid thing that falls out of the mouth of a pagan I have some connection to.

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May 29, 2013

does my religion make my ass look fat?

So much this. I struggle these days with even calling myself a shred of a Hellenic recon because they are do terribly unwelcoming. I’ve tried to engage them, to share my research and knowledge, but unless it fits perfectly in their bubble… you are not a Hellene. Whatever.

suzsmuses

don’t tell me. i know it does.

dammit. and i was just getting into a size that felt comfy and looked good.

i just never seem to stay there long. just as i’m getting lean and mean and recon trim, i’ll have a breakthrough in my cm practice or get caught up in some traditional witchcrafty Work, and bam! i get all poofy and puffy and fluffy, and move way too far down the ceremonial and neopagan end of the spectrum to get to hang out with the hardcore recon crowd any more. or i’ll tip over into berkertland, and get so enamored with recreating minutiae of obscure cult practices that no one but the odd recluse, or terminal pedant, or eyeball-rattling insane person would find remotely interesting let alone understand. and my neopagan friends don’t wanna play with me no more.

one of the things i love about the…

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February 19, 2013

Oh Gods, Not Again

–or why do we still care what Fox News Network thinks?

Alright, unless you have been living completely under a rock, or perhaps aren’t in the United States, you know that this happened. I know about it. I can’t not know about it because every American pagan seems to have his or her panties in a frenzied twist over the matter. And I have one major question for all of them: why?

Why?

Fox News has always been the breeding ground for big-mouthed, closed-minded, conservative blow-hards. They don’t even try to be anything but that. What about their programming makes any sane person think that they are gearing themselves to the actual everyday man? Nothing. So I can’t fathom why everyone is so up in arms about some previously aforementioned conservative blow-hard spouting their mouth off about things they don’t understand and quite frankly, don’t want to understand.

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January 23, 2013

Really? I mean, really?

So, I’m probably going to get a ton of flack for posting the email in its entirety here, but I have to get a few things off my chest. I’ll discuss my online radio silence in another post later.

First of all, yes, I do have a profile on WitchVox. But, it’s pretty darn specific about the path I follow and I created it back in like 2000, used it to create listings for various pagan groups I led and so forth. I just haven’t taken it down yet. I think I get one message every two or three years and they are always personal questions like if I know of anyone in my area that does ___. So, imagine my surprise to get this little gem in my inbox last night.

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December 23, 2012

Happy Winter Holiday

I’m entering that time of year where I start to hate most people of most faiths. It starts around Halloween and ends somewhere around mid-January. It’s not for any one faith or reason, mind you. It’s just a conglomeration of things that makes me stabby. There really is no ‘War on Christmas’ as the media would like you to think. But there is a certain degree of insensitivity other people have about people of other faiths. As if for about three months we lose our collective minds in an attempt to educate everyone we come across about our faith and cause.

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November 21, 2012

Of Death and Things

I just made a long post on Facebook about how cynical I am getting about life and its purpose. For those of you that don’t have me on Facebook, I’ll share it here:

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October 21, 2012

A Bit of a Rant

I’m going to rant for a moment. Well, it will take far more than a moment, but I’m going to say something that has needed to be said for a long time. There will probably be profanity, there will be radical concepts for some pagans to grasp and it might just anger you. Which is fine, because maybe then you are thinking for yourself. I am going to put my foot down on this natural remedy/alternative medicine bullshit pagans cling to like it’s some kind of messiah and say: Stop it. Just, knock it off. If it works for you, great, but stop preaching it as gospel of being pagan.

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June 6, 2012

I have very similar thoughts to this, most of the time.

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